Skip to main content

Go Bigger, Go Non-sense

It's not often a company admits their customers are stupid, but here's one.


Greg likes big things

No matter how costly, useless, wasteful, or dangerous to his health. Greg seems to buy as much as he can.

Buying an ice-cream as a kid? Get one so tall you can't start licking it without spilling the entire thing.

Getting a hair-do in the 80s? Make you hair enormous by spraying 2 parts hairspray to 1 part hair.

Going to the movies? Buy a popcorn serving the size of a small table. The movie will finish before you've eaten 4% of it.

Going on another date? Impress your lady-friend by ordering a basketball-sized burger. Nothing says romance like leaving with 5 litres of food in your belly, bursting to get out (one way or the other).

Why does Greg never learn?

Apparently Greg "knows" that bigger is better. No amount of spilt ice-cream, boxes of leftover popcorn, or dates ruined by regurgitated burger can convince him otherwise. Perhaps that can of hairspray leached into his brain.

What's this ad for?

Cut to the present day and Greg (still with too much popcorn) is watching a monster-truck on (you guessed it) a monster-TV.

The ad is for TVs that measure 75, 85 and 100 inches.

What?

Why are TVs one of the few things in Australia still measured in inches? Perhaps 100 inch sounds less insane than a 2.54 metre telly.

Who buys a 2.54m telly? The 2.54m TV doesn't have to sell. It's main job is to make the 85 inch (2.16m) look slightly less insane by comparison.

Presented only with 75, 85 and 100, suddenly the 85 looks like the middle-of-the-road option, rather than ridiculously oversized.

In reality even the 'small' 75-inch is 1.91 metres. That's bigger than most people. Who needs a TV bigger than themself?

Perhaps the slogan should be "Go Bigger. Go Non-sense"

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

What to do with 128 pens?

I never need buy a pen again. Ever. The pen round-up. I searched the house for pens and gathered them up. We had 128. Woah - that's more than I expected. Then it was test-time. (You can get a lot done watching summer sport ;). Good ones went on the table. Broken ones in the box. Pen operations I saved a few 'broken' pens, by taking working insides and matching them with functional outsides. Particularly much-loved pens, for sentimental reasons, were given a life-extending 'ink transplant'. Final Tally We ended up with 67 broken pens and 61 good ones. And about 10 pencils. What to do with 67 broken pens? In my city Biome recycles pens . It's as easy as taking them into the store and dropping them into the giant collection box. Decluttering and recycling together - I love it. A lifetime of pens An average pen writes 45,000 words. So that dedicated shopping list pen on the fridge could write a 20-word shopping list for 43 years. Our 61 pens repre...

How to waste a year's wages

A friend recently asked me why it is that so many people (on good incomes) are struggling to save. Often the big three money areas are housing, transport and food. In one sense these are necessary items. But what we spend on them is often way more than necessary. I crunched some numbers on how much extra my wife and I could spend on these things - if for some reason we wanted to burn our money. 1. Housing Our apartment is fairly nice, but also cost-effective. I've mentioned how choosing it saves us $1,800 per year , compared to a similar one we saw. The high end of 2-bedroom apartments in our suburb is $305 per week more than our apartment. Not $305 per week. $305 per week more than ours is. I cannot get over that. Sure it's new and modern-looking, but that's a lot of money. It's an extra $15,860 per year above what we pay. 2. Transport The Australian Automobile Association lists the costs of owning and running a car. It includes many often-overlooked c...

Why millionaires don't "feel" rich

We're wealthier than ever - so why don't we feel like it? Australia has gone almost three decades without recession. The stock market recently hit a record high. Our wages are record highs. Home loan rates are at record lows. We live in one of the richest countries in the world at the richest point in history. So what's wrong? Comparison Wealth is relative. So what do we compare to? Where we expect to be? "When your wages growth is only 2 or 3 per cent, you don't feel as well-off as when it's going up 10 per cent. That's that nominal distortion that people often suffer from" , says economist Shane Oliver, and that "expectations have grown a lot faster than reality." We're earning more than last year, but we want even more. So compared to our imaginary situation, we see ourselves as worse off. What we see around us? Shane Oliver again. "If you think about it - Australians today are a lot wealthier. They're living far ric...